Awakening to Wholeness is a series of prompts, reflections, and teachings about how holding the tension of opposites can help us to heal division and experience wholeness. If you feel moved to share your own reflections, we invite you to email us with the subject line “Wisdom of Opposites” or tag us on social media with #EHoPWisdomOfOpposites.
Over our entire lifespan, we are enticed by wanting things “my way,” from the toddler who wants all the toys and the play activity to be “mine,” to the aging and sickly who want to spell out their decisions and choices for end-of-life care. The path of “my way” is prominent, and often, possible.
Similarly, the path of “your way” becomes possible when we begin to learn the dance of interacting with others. In some cases, following the path of “your way” surpasses conventional service and offers of self-giving. Like the path of “my way,” the path of “your way” can become lopsided if the person on this path focuses so much on others that they lose a sense of self.
The path of “my way” over-emphasizes self and the path of “your way” under-emphasizes self. As with all good pairs of opposites, the two pathways each have a lot to teach us in their own right. Even more wisdom is gained when we seek to reconcile the two ways.
Working out the path of “our way” is challenging due to the heavy lift of holding tensions. On the paths of “my way” and “your way,” once we learn the rhythms of the road, we can often set to “auto-pilot” and enjoy the security, control, and esteem that come by the habits of being focused either on ourselves or others. It gets more tricky to carve the path of “our way,” if I have to hold both my needs and the needs of others, if I have to consider both my perspectives and those of others, and especially, when I have to honor both my own preferences, as well as those of others! Even the most healthy of our family, friend, and community groups struggle with the complexity of building the path of “our way.” May we learn from the wisdom pattern of the Trinity, of the “third way,” as we make our way!
Contemplative Questions
We offer the following questions as prompts to help you reflect on the presence of opposites in your spiritual practice and your life.
- Think of a specific instance when you followed the path of “our way.” What would “my way” have looked like in this situation? What would “your way” have looked like?
- What challenges or complexities arose as you sought to honor the needs, perspectives, and preferences of both self and other?
- What did you learn from holding these tensions?
Join the conversation! If you feel moved to share your reflections, we invite you to email us with the subject line “Wisdom of Opposites” or tag us on social media with #EHoPWisdomOfOpposites.
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Christine Luna Munger
Christine Luna Munger, PhD currently serves as the director of the Episcopal House of Prayer. She previously served as Coordinator of the Spiritual Direction Certificate and Professor of Theology at St. Catherine University. She regularly writes, teaches, and leads group prayer sits at EHoP.
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